"If I can lift you up when you're down, I would have done a very good job! Thank you for dropping by."



Saturday, December 18, 2010

Village people power

Mark Zuckerberg’s parents must be wearing gigantic grins these days. Their son is not only one of the world’s youngest billionaires after co-founding Facebook (the social networking site), he is also Time magazine’s Person of the Year 2010.  According to Time, Mark received the honor “For connecting more than half a billion people and mapping the social relations among them, for creating a new system of exchanging information and for changing how we live our lives…”

When Time unveils their annual person of significance cover, I kind of wonder why there can’t be a Parents of the Year recognition as well.  With the honor bestowed on an accomplished and exemplary citizen like Mark, his parents have the right to the honorary spotlight.  After all, Mark didn’t grow up to be the outstanding human being that he is without any help from mom and dad.  There is no denying the fact that our family members, friends, teachers, classmates, doctors, nurses, pharmacists, faith healers, parish priests and significant others helped to mold us into what we have become.  Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton has publicized her belief that it takes a village to raise child.  Many citizens like me wholeheartedly support the village-raising-children alliance.  That can’t be farther from the truth.  It is the absolute truth!

That is perhaps precisely the reason that wealthy parents take pains in checking out the nanny backgrounds.  In most cases, the hired nannies spend more time with the children than the parents themselves.  Blame it on today’s thrust for material advancement!  Therefore, it becomes imperative that nannies are qualified to fill in for the absentee parents.  

I beg your forgiveness for stating this, but parents who can’t afford the nanny arrangement rely on technology to do their job.  Thus we see the young ones these days attached to their electronic gadget of choice.  The school kids I share the morning ride with are constantly texting on their cell phones, reading something on their mini laptops, or listening to some wild music on their iPods.  Today we see generations of kids who don’t show any good manners and lack any respect for the elderly (perhaps no one taught them the courtesy of offering a seat to a senior citizen in a packed bus!).  During one evening ride, the bus driver told a male kid to behave himself as he was screaming at another kid who he thought was messing with him.  Instead of merely keeping quiet, he lashed loud at the woman on the wheel, calling her the “worst, fat ass driver” he had ever met.  Such an outburst coming from a middle school boy was bizarre.  I wonder how he'll handle constructive criticism when he got older?  Wouldn’t it be wonderful if our school system included Good Manners and Right Conduct in their curriculum?  If it’s indeed already there, the evidence begs to be seen
!

You see, when children behave badly, people are quick to point the finger on the people who raised them.  Even the school system gets the blame.  We were children once and as we all know, children are like sponges.  They soak their environment and feed off of the people who surround them.  If you hear a little kid scream a dirty word, it is most likely that he picked it up at home or from the television or from the other kids or adults whose company he keeps.

I have known families who didn’t have a lot of money when the children were growing up.  But because there was more than enough love to go around, the children grew up with a great deal of confidence to conquer the world.  It’s that kind of upbringing that allows children to get inspired to be ambitious, dreaming big dreams and raring to make something of themselves. 

We only have to look at Oprah Winfrey to realize that anything is possible.  She grew up in a broken home, shuttled between her mother and father in childhood, experienced abuse in her young age, but look at her now!  In due time Oprah reformed her wayward ways, fulfilling the dreams that her God envisioned for her.  In her own words, “God can dream a bigger dream for you than you can ever dream for yourself.”  She certainly proved that statement right, not only once, but countless of times.

Being born into privileged surroundings may be an advantage in life.  It can buy the best education, even get into the right connections.  But there have been many great men and women who came from very humble beginnings.  I won’t dare make a list as there are too many to mention.  From nothing they managed to make something of themselves.  They weren’t contented on merely scribbling on the sand, but carving etches of themselves on permanent walls of fame, blazing the trail for the children of tomorrow to emulate.

I’ve read that Mark Zuckenberg was raised in a comfortable, supportive home with a psychiatrist mom and a dentist dad.  He’s not even 30 years old yet his accomplishments have far exceeded anyone’s expectations.  His Harvard education may have influenced his desire for the kind of success he has already achieved at age 26.  But because he followed his passion, the money flowed.  He not only pursued his love of computer programming, he ended up making a monumental contribution to the world’s Information Age.

Facebook wasn’t a totally novel idea when it came to life during Mark's Harvard days.  It is the enhanced version of the "Photo Address Book" student directory that generated much interest during Mark's time in high school.  It most certainly must have provided the light bulb moment in his inquisitive mind.  The photo directory which the students called "The Facebook" listed the students' profile, telephone numbers and personal attributes, pretty much what can be found in the social networking site we’re familiar with today.  Facebook is basically a viral enhancement of that school directory concept.  The germ of a brilliant idea was there.  Mark seized the opportunity and polished the gem.  He made it work, not only in one continent, but worldwide (wherever the Internet firewall would allow).  The open information flow he created for the people of the world has enabled long-distance family members, friends and associates to keep in touch notwithstanding the gaps of time and distance,  Life in war zone areas must have become bearable for the military personnel because of it. 

There's no question that Mark has raised the bar for today’s 20-somethings.  The young ones shouldn’t really feel intimidated.  As long as they’re embraced in a nice, comfortable, loving village, they can be who they want to be someday.  They should take their time getting there.  No pressure!  The important thing is to grow up and become a decent human being because success won’t mean much if a good heart is missing.

On the cover of Time, Mark looks just like any unassuming boy-next-door.  It should be encouraging for any young man or woman wanting to reach for the stars.

Friday, December 17, 2010

The eternal flame of kindness

This time of the year is typically the season when people practice more kindness to everyone than at any other time of the year.  Somehow this seasonal practice intrigues me. The same way that it puzzles me why many people think that the Thanksgiving holiday is the only ideal time for being thankful.

Am I alone in my opinion that today’s world has become increasingly unkind?  People are more concerned about saving to be able to buy the latest electronic gadget than giving to charities that need help.  I have seen how passersby would completely ignore the Salvation Army kettle despite the persistent bell ringing of the person manning it.  At the bus stop, it’s painful to watch passengers scramble to get on board when there’s a handicapped person needing to get on the ramp first. Even the simple gesture of holding the door for someone behind us in a public place seems to have become a rare act of kindness. 

America used to be a kinder nation.  Perhaps, due to the downhill trend of our economy, citizens who are financially hurting have lost their patience and their ability to be gracious and kind.  The money madness that made this country so great is perhaps also driving it to lose its soul.

What has become of our universe?  People are frequently in a mad fastforward pace.  The cell phone chatters are getting louder (and more graphic) even in cramped public places.  People nowadays talk about delicate matters that used to be sacred… things we used to discuss only in whispers or in our private space.  Motorists have become rude that it can be a fight for survival just crossing the street on the intersection even when the light indicates the pedestrian crossing sign. 

Most accidents have happened because people are always in a crazy hurry to be someplace.  Many drivers just want to show who has the right of way.... even if it doesn't belong to them at that instance.  A week ago the news of a full-term pregnant woman being run over by an SUV at an intersection crosswalk was horrifying.  The woman who was obviously just trying to get to the other side of the road ended up lying on the middle of the street with car marks on her stomach.  She lost the baby.  That was terrible considering that she was on the crosswalk, therefore had the right of way!  The accident occurred at a nice development where such a bizarre event was unheard of.  It was dark when the tragic incident happened and no one in the neighborhood could identify the SUV license tag.  It was a hit and run and today the driver is still in hiding.

Kindness should be like an eternal flame that never burns out in the human heart.  If practiced by and to anyone, regardless of race, color, shape and creed, our world will be a more giving and loving place. 

I would like to share the poem I have grown attached to since finding it on a page of the Reader’s Digest a very long time ago.  My personal belief is that if every child in our universe can take to heart the message of kindness and proper behavior contained in this poem, our world will be a perpetually pleasant place to be in.

All I Really Need To Know I Learned in Kindergarten
by Robert Fulghum

Most of what I really need
To know about how to live
And what to do and how to be
I learned in kindergarten.
Wisdom was not at the top
Of the graduate school mountain,
But there in the sandpile at Sunday school.

These are the things I learned:

Share everything.
Play fair.
Don’t hit people.
Put things back where you found them
Clean up your own mess.
Don’t take things that aren’t yours.
Say you’re sorry when you hurt somebody.
Wash your hands before you eat.
Flush.
Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you.
Live a balanced life –
Learn some and think some
And draw and paint and sing and dance
And play and work every day some.
Take a nap every afternoon.
When you go out into the world,
Watch out for traffic.
Hold hands and stick together.
Be aware of wonder.

The poem is a statement of very basic decent human conduct.  Very simple to execute really, but for some reason, many people on this earth just don't get the importance of being nice.

May I add my personal thanks to Mr. Fulghum for this very thoughtful piece.  People of this Planet, we may be stuck in this world together, so let's all get along and be kind to one another!

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Fortune in our cyber mailbox



Every day more and more scammers are coming out of the woodwork through the Internet.  When I open my electronic mailbox, there’s likely to be one or two messages from perfect strangers promising an inherited fortune beyond my dreams.  Obviously, many people out there would rather spend their time concocting outrageous fraudulent schemes to steal money from me and all the other hard-working folks.  It takes time and talent to come up with out-of-this-world money theft scenarios.  My hope is that anyone who receives such a message would read it for what it is:  A SCAM.

Many such emails not only try to get our personal data (known as phishing).  In many instances we are asked to shell out money before the “funds” could be released.  That is the red flag, my friends!  Even if you’re promised a fortune in return for the $50 or $100 fee you need to pay upfront, DON’T DO IT!  Once you part with your money, say goodbye. 

Just this week, I received the following incredible messages which I’ve copied and pasted (typos and all) from my inbox.  I’m sharing these for the benefit of those who don’t know what a fraudulent email reads like.

From: owen <linda_owen0202@rediffmail.com>
Sent: Wed, December 15, 2010 9:37:23 AM
Subject: Donation from Mrs linda

Dearest in Christ, with due respect and humanity, I am contacting you under a humanitarian ground. I am Mrs Linda Owen; I was born in Baltimore, Maryland in America, and was married to Mr. John Owen, Director J.W Industries Cote d'Ivoire . We were married for 36 years with an only child who later died in a ghastly car accident. My husband died in 2006 after a Cardiac Arteries Operation. Recently, my Doctor told me that I have a precise time to live due to my stroke and cancer illness (cancer of the liver).
 
Before my husband died, there is this sum of Seven Million, Five Hundred Thousand Dollars (US$7.500.000) which he deposited with a Private security company here In Ivory Coast . Presently, this money is still in the custody of the Security Company.
 
I want someone who will use this fund according to the desire of my late husband, that is; to help the less privileged, orphans, widows, victims of war, terrorist attacks, natural disaster and most of its all, propagating the word of God. Though I have a precise time to live, I am not afraid of death hence I know my reward before our Almighty. Please always remember me in your daily prayers for my upcoming cancer surgery.
 
Looking forward to hear from you soon. God bless you.
 
Mrs Linda Owen.  

* * *

From:
Mr Roy Dukiya (roydukiya@live.fr)
Sent:
Wed 12/15/10 5:10 AM


FROM OFFICE OF ECOWAS PAYMASTER GENERAL
21 AVENUE DE LA LIBERATION
Cotonou,BENIN.
DATE: 14/DEC/2010

Good Day,
 
Please be informed that you were earlier listed to receive all $800,000.00 via Western Union money Transfer services. This is to ensure that no official in the Banking sector has access to your funds or handle it. But having considered the fact that western union can only transfer maximum of $5,000.00 per day, it makes it very cumbersome for you to receive all the $800.000.00 through western union. On this note we decided to make a Direct Credit Transfer to an off-shore Asian Bank which is online to assist us in paying out your funds.
 
As a matter of fact, your payment has since been effected through a new secure system for making fast payments, the money is in a Online Bank Giro Swift Transfer Protocol and the transfer is set up under your name alone, so if you have no PIN withdrawal codes,you can not access your funds. The transaction is already online in the Giro Network Protocol,Atlantic Financial (Sarl) which is handling the payments should have sent you an email by now with details such as the Bank where you are to pick up the cash. You can pick up the cash at any convenient bank located in your area once your information and your nearest Bank of choice is programmed into the Giro Sysytems Protocol. If there are no convenient locations near you, you can request for Direct Cash on Transit Transfer of the cash directly to you.
 
To received your withdrawal codes you have to contact Director of Atlantic Financial Dr. Anthony Okpoka at his email ( anthonyokpoka@o2.pl ) Tel: +22996158701.
 
You will be charged $100, for the processing of your information into the Giro Online Network Protocol and your code will be sent to you to enable you cash your money at your nearest location (Bank) and your Bank can move the funds into your account directly on request.
 
When writing to Atlantic Financial, always include the following information:
 
Your Full Name =============
Address: -----------
Telephone number: -------
Your receiver Email: -----
Your Transaction Number: 17007045
Transfer Date: 13-12-2010 Validity (Until): 19-12-2010.
Transact Amount: $800, 000.00
 
Best Regards,
Mr. Roy Dukiya
Secretary to ECOWAS PAY MASTER

* * *

From:
HSBC PLC (admin@hsbcplc.com)
Sent:
Wed 12/15/10 1:49 PM


AHSBC BANK PLC LONDON.(REGISTERED NO.1026167).
ADDRESS: 8 CANADA SQUARE LONDON, E14 5HQ, UNITED KINGDOM.
 
Chairman Committee On Foreign Contract And
Inheritance fund Payment Notification
FROM:HSBC BANK PLC LONDON.
 
Attn: Beneficiary,
 
The U.S.A Government, World Bank And United Nations Organization Official Has Approved to pay you part payment of your Contract/ Inheritance Fund payment Valued at $5.5m USD in conjunction with British Government and HSBC BANK PLC LONDON.
 
This International remittance department(HSBC BANK PLC LONDON) was set up to discover an outstanding unpaid fund being owned to Governments or Individuals all over the world through Contract Payment,Inheritance and Lottery Winning Prize Awards.
 
However, decision was made last week. With this development, a woman by name (MRS:JANET WHITE) came to our office with an application stating that you gave her the power of attorney to be the beneficiary of your Outstanding contract/ Inheritance/award funds. She made us to believe that you are dead and that she is your next of kin. We got your email address and decided to send an email through this address hoping to find out if you are dead or alive and also to find out if you at any time gave this woman the power of attorney to represent you.
 
Please let us know also if you are aware that we are almost ready to transfer part payment of $5.5m USD of your outstanding funds to her nominated bank account stated below:
 
NAME OF BANK: FIRST NATIONAL BANK
ADDR: 120 SO. 2nd. ST.
BLYTHEVILLE,ARKANSAS 72315 USA
ACCOUNT NUMBER: 482986
ROUTING NUMBER:084107343
Swift code # : WMSBUS66
BENEFICIARY: JANET WHITE
 
If you are not aware of the above instruction, do respond to this email immediately by contacting the Chairman of the International remittance department.
 
His contact information are written below:
 
Name:Mr.Victor Williams.
email:hsbcplc011@yahoo.co.jp
 
For immediate transfer of your funds be informed that you are not allowed to correspond or contact any person or office with respect to this transfer other than this office, you are required to send to him an email with your full following information below:
 
1) YOUR FULL NAME
2) RESIDENCE ADDRESS, CITY, STATE AND COUNTRY
3) PERSONAL CELL PHONE,FAX AND MOBILE PHONE NUMBER
 
Yours Sincerely,
Mrs. Ann Almeida.
HSBC BANK PLC LONDON.

* * *

Date: Thu, 16 Dec 2010 00:23:08 -0800
From: consultofficefile@att.net
Subject: He will send you the payment ASAP


Dear colleague

Thanks on a very happy note andit is incredible your efforts , time and energy towards the project.Your tonic was why the large cash left finally after so many trails. Iwrite to inform you that at last, the fund transfer had been a SUCCESS.The Fund was later paid out and I have collected my own share.

Presently,I am in South Korea where, in partnership with a core investor in theMining Sector of their economy, we are investing in the industry. But,I am not oblivious of the fact that you did your best in that context,although, it seem that element of doubt crept in. I pressurized theinfluential woman to concede some amount as COMPENSATION to you. Youalready know that the other co investor that approved the fund Alvinpeter Kappelmann Jr died DURING the sept 11 attack mishap that killedthousands of peopel at the world trade center in the incidence whichthe international media broadcast it that warranted this payment as ibelieve you know. pls log in tohttp://www.cnn.com/SPECIALS/2001/memorial/people/2632.html to see theCNN report of the incidence and the confirmation of mr peters death.  Therefore your over due inheritance funds totalling $800,000 [thousandunited states dollars} has been approved and ractified by chrome oilboard company.

Because of my appointment in South Korea and too,I could not get through to you since your number at any time indicated"not in use", I then handed it over to my secretary.  His name is attorney chris coolman and his mail:(barrister2chriscoolman@gmail.com)

TheSecretary is very much informed by me about you and I instructed him tohand over the Draft to you without you paying a dime as soon as youcontact him.  I gave him the CODE 555, which you have to mention for identification.

Yours Sincerely and associate,
Mr.John Mba chiarman
chiarman chrome oil
middle east and london
* * *


From: Mr Hassan Muhammad <mrhassanmuhammad01@voila.fr>
Sent: Thu, December 16, 2010 9:55:49 AM
Subject: Trusting to hear from you immediately



I AM MR HASSAN MUHAMMAD
BILL AND EXCHANGE MANAGER.
BANK OF AFRICA (BOA)
OUAGADOUGOU , BURKINA FASO .

Dear Friend.

CONFIDENTIAL

I will like you to help me, in receiving of this fund into your Bank Account .However; it's just my urgent need for foreign partner that made me to contact you for this transaction. I am the manager of bill and exchange at the foreign remittance Department of BANK OF AFRICA (B.O.A) here in Ouagadougou , Burkina Faso. In my department we discovered an abandoned sum of (US$29.7 Million dollars) in an account that belongs to one of our foreign Customer (MR. PAUL LOUIS from Paris, France) who died along with His entire family in July 2003 in a plane crash.

I am afraid if this money stays in our bank without claim for long period of time, our government will step in because
The Banking laws here does not allow such huge amount of money to stay
Dormant for more than 8years. And you will be receiving this money into your Bank account within 10 or 14 banking days.

The Banking law and guideline here stipulates that if such money remained unclaimed after Eight years an above, the money will be transferred into the Bank treasury as unclaimed fund. I agree that 40% of this money will be for you as foreign partner in respect to the provision of a foreign account, and while 60%would be for me.

If you agree to my business proposal, further details of the transfer will be forwarded to you as soon as I receive your return mail. Make sure you keep this transaction as your top secret and make it confidential till we receive the fund into the account that you will provide to the Bank. Don't disclose it to any body, because the secrecy of this transaction is as well as the success of it, have a great day.

but before i send to you the text of application form which you will fill and send it to the bank, I will like you to send me the following information
( 1.)Name in full:....................................
( 2.)Address:..........................................
( 3.)Nationality:......................................
( 4.)Age:....................................................
( 5.)Sex......................................................
( 6.)Occupation:.......................................
( 7.)Marital status:.................................
( 8.)Priavte telephone no..............................
( 9.)Private fax no:..................................
Note this,please reply me with this email address (mrhassanmuhammad1@voila.fr) for security purpose.

Place contact me urgently
Yours faithfully.
Mr Hassan Muhammad


* * *

My BFF Josie B. just told me that her lawyer associate has a client who was swindled by a bogus Nigerian lottery winning communication.  We may find it hard to believe, but many people are actually taking such fraudulent emails as gospel truth.  As a conqequence, their bank accounts get hacked and the victims end up losing their life savings.  Unfortunately, many of them are too embarassed to come forward!  It would be really nice to get an unexpected windfall which many emails similar to the above are giving away.  Always bear in mind that if the gesture is too generous to be true, it can only be a scam.  We work hard for our money and we should guard it with our life!
 

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Comfy like an old pair of shoes

Being in the company of certain people can give us a moment of blah.  You know, the sheer feeling of general discomfort and total disconnect?  If you interact with humanity on a daily basis, chances are, you'll find yourself in such a situation.  Fortunately, most of the folks I interact with don’t give me any reason to shy.  Many people are easy to get along with and on a few occasions, I’ve actually experienced instant rapport.    

I hope that even for once in your life, you’ve had the chance to bond with someone instantly.  Many might call it chemistry... but the cozy platonic kind.  Having such a bond can make conversations painless and effortless, right?  It feels good when that happens. 

For instance, there’s this guy I met on my ride home a few years ago.  It was conversation magic at first chat!  His name is Doug and we share the same bus ride most afternoons.  This year I missed his company many times because he loves taking weeks off from work, or sometimes he would wake up late for the bus schedule and had to drive to the office.  When that happens, and it's been happening a lot lately (hopefully, it's not because he's avoiding me!), it means taking the bus home without him.  Anyway, no matter how long we won’t see each other, we easily pick up where we left off. 

Doug and I watch a few reality TV shows (not in the same room, OK!).  “The Bachelor” and “The Bachelorette,” among them.  After so many seasons, I watch these shows to keep my evenings entertained, not because I am hopeful that a love match would eventually happen.  During the ride home, Doug would take a break from his Sudoku and I from a Word Search puzzle to compare notes on our increasing disgust over these shows.  The wild and seemingly mentally deranged women who are "allegedly" looking for Mr. Right. The physically buffed good-looking men who claim to be looking for love.  They usually resemble some kind of poster models.  Those people can’t fool me and Doug.  We know they’re on TV for publicity or to start a career on something that requires public adulation.  What God-fearing man or woman would enjoy their private mating to be broadcasted to the world?  Such TV shows only contribute to washing morals down the drain.  That’s why even school kids these days don’t have qualms showing extreme public displays of affection in common places. 

“Survivor” is another show we love to discuss.  I think Doug and I both enjoy the group dynamics that go on all the time.  The sneaky alliances, the bizarre promises people make and mind-boggling moves to get to the top.  If those are the kinds of folks I’ll have to deal with every day of my life, I’ll certainly want to move to another planet!  A couple of episodes ago, two of the remaining nine wanted out.  They (both women named Kelly Shinn and NaOnka Mixon) left the show with 11 days remaining on Jeff Probst’s watch.  They claimed that their bodies had given up, and I suspect it’s from the lack of comfortable surroundings they've been accustomed to and the malnourishment from the absent fine food.  When this episode aired, I couldn't help but mentally scream at my TV:  Lots of people out there would die to be casted on “Survivor” and you’re giving up your chance to win a million grand?   

Of course, this bailing out wasn’t the first time it happened on the show.  The contenders need to pound into their heads what they’re getting into before committing to be in “Survivor.”  When anyone opts out, they just end up looking like a wimp whose genuine intention was simply to gain their minutes of fame.  I haven’t seen Doug since the last two episodes aired, but I’m positive that he’ll have nothing good to say about it.  I can’t wait to tell him what I think!

“The Amazing Race” is another show we both enjoy watching.  Last Sunday’s episode was the finale and I was happy for the female doctor team (Kat Chang and Nat Strand) who outran everyone.  They’ve been my favorite contenders since the season aired.  I believe that their grace under pressure (not talking dirty when the heat was on) and likable personalities make them deserving of the million dollar reward.  I’m thrilled that a female team finally won the competition!  About time that the women stepped up to the plate!  They look like really wonderful people and they absolutely deserve the prize.  This show typically brings out the worst in people when they’re in stress mode and I hate it when couples’ relationships fall apart for the world to see. 

Anyway, back to the "looking for love" show.  Brad Womack, the next Bachelor, is again looking for The One.  As you may know, it’s his second time to do this ridiculous dating spectacle.  In his first season, he dumped both girls who happened to be his top two picks.  One of the girls publicly confessed that she wanted to date him even after she was publicly rejected, but he wouldn't hear it.  I learned through the grapevine that he went into therapy after the season ended.  Something to do with his being a commitment-phobe.  I don’t understand why someone with an emotional handicap would be chosen to be the lead in a dating show whose purpose for being is to have a happy ending!  If he suffered from that problem, did he believe that the public dating (with cameras taking note of every move) would be the cure he needed? 

Although I don’t really expect a love match this season (but for Brad's sake, I hope it comes to pass!), the show will provide much substance for me and Doug to chew on.  I wish people well (especially the girls who are in it for a possible high profile media career), and I hope that Brad would finally find his soul mate or the one who will make the television journey all worth while.  If it doesn’t happen, I hope that the producers don’t give him a third chance, even if that might be the charm.  

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

A hostage in my own home

The other day I had the news of the Midwest deep freeze for breakfast.  Amidst a dumping of snow drifts, motorists found themselves trapped on travel-unfriendly highways.  Travelers spent very long hours in airports due to flight cancellations.  The TV news showed citizens digging their vehicles out of snow mountains and walking in knee-deep snow right in their own neighborhoods!

The messy frozen weather scenario rang a very familiar bell.  A few years ago, the city I call home went through the same blizzard disaster.  That day started out fine with clear skies although there had been a heavy snow forecast bordering on blizzard conditions.  I went to the office as usual, hoping that it would be just another snowy day, but some time before lunch, the skies turned ominous gray and the snow fell without let-up.  The more snow that touched the ground, the worse the day became.  Before it could get any worse, our management decided to close shop so that everyone could go home safe.

One of my associates got stranded on the highway and had to check into a hotel.  The others made it home although their drives took much longer than usual.  I had to take three train rides and waiting for my connecting bus home at the Park-n-Ride almost took forever.  I was just glad to be standing under a roof over my head or it could have been worse! The wind chill factor was a killer and if I wasn't all bundled up, I could have frozen to death waiting for the bus.  The wait took much longer than usual because the traffic got all messed up in many places.  I felt lucky, really lucky, that my bus even showed up!  What normally took an hour’s home commute turned into a miserable four.  Despite the cold, uncomfortable wait for every ride, I felt grateful that I managed to get home in one piece.

The walk home was another big adventurous hurdle.  The snow was up to my knees and walking the one block home was a real drag!  Finally, when I saw the roof of my home from the distance, I felt tremendous relief!  There was two feet of snow outside my front door.  My last memory of the outside world was the sight of my car buried in snow!

The next couple of days held me hostage in my own home.  The snow drifts covered all of my doors and windows and I couldn’t even look out.  Thank goodness for my home computer, telephone and the television.  All three served as my link to the world.  I was thankful that despite the horrible weather, power didn’t go out.  I could watch the news, email the people in my life, even cook my meals!

Unfortunately, because the blizzard brought havoc to most places that were unpassable, the guys who were responsible for shoveling the neighborhood snow couldn’t come right away.  It took them three days to clear the paths and driveways.  As I couldn’t open my front door, fearing that the five inch snow that accumulated outside might come in and make a wet mess in my living room, I didn’t know what was going on outside my house.  All I could see was the white blanket plastered on all my windows.

It was a total relief when, after a few days, the weather allowed the guys to finally work on clearing my front porch of the heavy snow.  The sun came out later that week, melting the snow accumulations and turning the once white pristine snow into splashes of mud.  Flooding occurred in many places.  Everyone hated the ugly muddy consequence, but I’m sure that all were thankful that the worse was behind us.

Despite the minor inconvenience of having to dodge splashes of muddy waters on the street, it felt beautiful to be able to walk outside and see the movements of life after being stuck in my own home for three days. 

Nowadays I always love to say, life is good, even if sometimes we have to deal with bad and nasty weather.

Monday, December 13, 2010

Planning the end

Death is one subject that many people would rather not discuss.  I mean, planning their own death.  That includes the preparation of the documents that can make their final days more convenient for them and the people in their life.

I used to be like everyone else where the subject of dying was concerned.  I had heard about the Last Will and Testament, however, the thought of executing one never became a priority.  But my God had a plan for me.  When I lost my full-time job, He made my former manager talk me into working part-time for her husband who happened to be a lawyer... an estate planning attorney!  After dodging her part-time work offer for a year, I finally gave in after my job search produced no positive prospects at that time.  Accepting the work was a wise decision because it made me realize the importance of planning our death.

For a few hours a day, I went to the attorney’s office and did the work I never planned on doing:  helping to execute people’s dying wishes!  It was probably the most depressing eight months of my work life.  The genuine surprise for me was the realization that many folks out there wanted to do this thing.  They would make appointments, come into the office, spend some time with my lawyer boss discussing the things they needed to unburden when it’s their time to go.  That included who got their savings account, who should have the precious china collection, who inherited the pet dog… each and every material thing that meant the world to them when they are still alive.  When they had agreed on the package terms (pricing and documents to be prepared), the lawyer and I would prepare the legal documents, the clients would come back for the document execution, most of them leaving the office looking quite relieved for having taken the time to prepare their end.

The basic package included the Last Will and Testament and Medical Power-of-Attorney.  The former gave instructions on who gets what and stated other provisions; the last assigned the people in their life who were given the authority to make health care decisions on their medical situation. 

A more comprehensive package included the Financial Power-of-Attorney, Living Will and Cremation Mandate.  The Financial Power-of-Attorney appoints someone in the event that they become unconscious, comatose or incompetent to make or communicate responsible decisions concerning their financial affairs.  The Living Will is a declaration of one’s wish concerning the termination of medical treatment and life support systems, appointing  the decision-making responsibility to the people designated.  It includes direction on how life-sustaining methods and equipment should be handled.  To pull the plug or not is stipulated.  The Cremation Mandate is a declaration of one’s wish to have the bodily remains cremated following death. 

Discussing the specifics of our death can be most depressing, and the topic can bring a lot of sadness, but it needs to be done while we are still able to do so.  All the documents mentioned above will alleviate the potential conflict caused by leaving this world unprepared.  There had been clients who executed their documents prior to going into surgery the next day.  I remember one who didn’t make it, and what a relief to her family members that she died with her paperwork in order!

If anyone doesn’t like the idea of getting an attorney involved due to financial reasons, estate planning kits are available on the Internet.  Find the forms that are recognized in your state of residence.  Complete the forms that are applicable in your case.  Once the completed forms are notarized, provide copies to the appropriate people in your life.  Make sure that an original copy of all the executed documents are in a safe place (a safety deposit box at the bank is one good location).  Then you can relax confident that you have prepared yourself for the inevitable.

Do it for yourself, and if you have a spouse and children, you have a more pressing reason to get it done.  The life insurance policy (if you have one) will take care of the financial aspect of death, but there is more to paying the bill.  The decision as to whether or not it is worth pulling the plug, when such a life-ending predicament ever needs to be made, has to fall on someone’s shoulder, if and when you can’t make that decision for yourself.

As the boy scouts say, “Be prepared.”  I don’t think that it applies only while we are healthy and breathing.  Preparedness has a bigger significance when the end of the road is near.

Sunday, December 12, 2010

Gung-ho about feng shui


A few years ago, a former work associate (let's call her BJ) put up her condominium for sale.  After almost two years, it remained unsold.  That was pre-recession when houses were selling like hotcakes!  She was, no doubt, in a panic as the property was becoming a money pit, causing serious cash flow problems. You see, besides the mortgage payment for that unsold condominium, she was simultaneously paying for the monthly mortgage of her primary residence.

BJ had heard about feng shui (Chinese word meaning wind-water; pronounced fung-shway) and the wonders it could bring to believers.  She knew that I had been practicing it since the time I learned how it could be applied in my life.  My learning process began before I lost my job at another company (before I worked with BJ).  Then post-layoff I needed any kind of amulet that could possibly bring me good luck.  Thus, absorbing feng shui became a full-time passion.   The two year period I spent looking for work also gave me the opportunity to deeply absorb this Chinese art of placement.

One day BJ asked if I could go with her to take a look at her property for sale.  Without her telling me, I knew that she thought that with my feng shui knowledge, I might be able to see what might have been causing the problem.  I also knew that she wanted me to apply the necessary feng shui cure.

Once we got to the condominium, I immediately noticed how cramped the space was behind the front door.  There was a wall on the right side which prevented the door from swinging with ease. In feng shui, the wider the main door (the mouth) of the house and the bigger space it enters into (a spacious foyer or wide hall), the easier for energy (known as chi in feng shui) to flow in.  It is through the main door that good luck comes.  Therefore the larger the room it opens into, the better.  Spacious room equals auspicious energy flow equals good fortune.  Get the drift?  

For a feng shui cure, on the main door knob I tied a bright red ribbon from which hang three bagua coins (Chinese coins with square holes in the center).    Outside just at the side of the entrance, we buried three more bagua coins under a big rock, a symbolic gesture inviting good fortune to enter the house.

When we went up the second floor, I immediately noticed that the top of the stairs faced the door to the bathroom.  The bottom step of the stairs going down the basement had the same layout.  In feng shui, it is bad for the staircase to confront the front door.  The symbolic meaning is money leaving the house!  It is worse when the stairs face a door that opens into the bathroom.  It can be financially disastrous.  All that flushing can't be good for the money!  I advised BJ to hang a crystal from the ceiling between the bathroom and the stairs and to do the same in the basement. 

Under the staircase going down the basement, there was a bar counter with a faucet.  Another feng shui taboo!  It means family wealth loss because everything drains away.  Just think, we step on dirt because it means nothing to us.  Water is a precious commodity in our life and should not be stepped on.  I couldn’t help but make a comment to BJ that whoever designed the layout was a bad architect.  It turned out to be her uncle! 

I advised BJ to hang a crystal underneath the staircase, hopefully, to send away the bad energy caused by the water-feature-under-the-stairs layout.  I didn't read in any feng shui book about the hang-a-crystal remedy for the water-under-the staircase situation.  I just believe that crystal is a good feng shui remedy.  Besides,the only solution for BJ's basement bar situation was to renovate the area, and that was out of the question. 

I did all I could to assure BJ that if she believed that the house would be sold soon, it would happen before she knew it.  Her faith mattered because if she (the seller) had any doubt in her heart, that was the message she was sending to the Universe.  You know, the Universe always listens!

I can’t remember how many more months passed after that feng shui episode, but eventually, the property sold!  Needless to say, my associate was extremely relieved.

Today there is a wealth of feng shui information because it has gained popularity over the years.  My personal belief is that feng shui is the auspicious placement of things in the home.  The Chinese art that balances yin and yang for creating harmonious surroundings.  Wikipedia describes it as “an ancient Chinese system of aesthetics believed to use the laws of both Heaven (astronomy) and Earth (geography) to help improve life receiving positive qi.”  Qi (pronounced chi or chee) means energy.  According to the same source, “A traditional explanation of qi as it relates to feng shui would include the orientation of a structure, its age, and its interaction with the surrounding environment including the local microclimates, the slope of the land, vegetation, and soil quality.”  Until now, it all sounds Greek to me!

When I started studying it, my mind could only absorb so much data.  It all read like a foreign language to me, especially as many different books contradicted each other.  To save myself any confusion, I focused on the books written by a feng shui expert who happens to be the best selling author on the subject.  After the initial intimidation I experienced during the learning process, I found a way of absorbing the essential concepts of this awesome Asian practice that I could actually use in my life.  Forget the complicated data that many ancient cultures in the East practiced for thousands of years!  I settled for those that I could easily incorporate into my world. 

For me, feng shui is all about symbolism.  We can organize our home or office in accordance with feng shui orientation, by putting the auspicious symbols we want to become a reality in our life in the corners of our home that represent Wealth, Fame, Relationships, Creativity, Helpful People, Career, Knowledge and Health.  If done correctly, and with good luck, we will achieve the goal that we desire. 

But the first and foremost requirement in practicing feng shui is to have a good heart.  I learned this from a book written by an Asian feng shui master.  No matter how we feng shui everything in our life, if that prime human requirement is missing, the desired result will never come to be. 

Donald Trump believes in the power of feng shui.  So should anyone, if attracting good vibes and success in life is the goal to be achieved.

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Out of the norm (the doctor’s office) cure, anyone?


Not too long ago, I suffered from my typical start-of-autumn out of sorts predicament.  Uncomfortable scratchy throat, sniffling nose, even flu-like condition   The cold virus is ever present anywhere at this time of the year, especially in the public transit system where passengers are prone to cough and sneeze.  Because I love to share my work commute with humanity, my immune system is always an easy target!

Notwithstanding my regular multivitamin and Vitamin C intake, I manage to catch any unhealthiness that floats in the air.  Some people might call it hypochondria, but for me it's the real thing!  One not-too-long-ago morning was no exception.  When I reached the office and sat down to work, my throat felt unusually tickled and my nose started a blow fest that lasted for almost the entire work day.  It was so bad that I felt weak and fatigued from all the fluids that left my body.  As everyone will agree, feeling that way is no way to handle a day at work.

Like some folks, I don’t like taking over-the-counter medicine as the effect on me makes me totally unproductive.  There’s the nausea or drowsiness that can result from merely taking a cold or cough medication.  Not too long ago, I discovered an awesome cure for my scratchy throat predicament.  Ginger.  I mean, fresh ginger root, not the powdered kind in a bottle.  When my last itchy throat and cold episode occurred, I made it a daily routine to cut a portion and slice it in small pieces (skin peeled off, of course),  put it in a cup of water, let it sit in the microwave for two minutes.  Then drink it.  After drinking my ginger tea, I would often chew on the ginger slices.  The taste was atrocious I’ll admit, but since I wanted to feel well, I had to grin and bear it. In one Asian country (the Philippines), chewing ginger is believed to drive away evil spirits.  Technically, that’s what I did!  After doing the same nightly routine, pretty soon I felt fine like no virus had ever invaded my body.

I love ginger, not only for medicinal reasons, but also for culinary purpose.  It makes certain dishes taste good!  Fresh ginger is part of Asian cooking, used in pork, seafood, vegetable and chicken cuisines.  In Western countries, ginger has been an ingredient in biscuits, puddings and cakes.  If you enjoy gingerbread and ginger snaps, thank the awesome ginger!

Other medicinal uses of ginger include relief of indigestion, stomach cramps, diarrhea and gas pains.  Morning and motion sickness are also curable by ginger intake.  Because ginger loosens and expels phlegm from the lungs, it helps to relieve respiratory problems.

Did you know that ginger is a common kitchen aphrodisiac?  The Kama Sutra mentioned in the chapter under "occult practices"  that ginger has the power to gain a woman’s affection.  Men searching for the elusive Ms. Right should pay attention!  To gather more information on the benefits of this tuber, please visit this link:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ginger.

Before I discovered the ginger cure, my sore throat practice was squeezing fresh lemon juice into a cup of water, adding a pinch of salt and microwaving the mixture for two minutes. Then I would gurgle the concoction.  In no time at all, the tickle in my throat would be gone and I‘ll be rid of the nasty sore throat. 

As you may know, lemon has many quality uses besides being an ingredient for drinks or dishes.  Its reason for being is not only to be eaten, but to be a cleansing agent. The wonders of lemons are enumerated in http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lemon.  Check it out!

Even garlic is good for the human heart, known to prevent heart disease, high blood pressure and high cholesterol.  It can also fight the common cold.  More information is available at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Garlic.

It is said that frequently eating onions can lead to good health because this bulb plant is good for the common cold and heart disease.  Get more facts at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Onion.

A couple of months ago, I learned about the papaya cure for digestive problems.  Other cures can be found in this site:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Papaya.

Wow, if we can all enjoy healthy lives by simply growing certain things in our backyard, wouldn’t that be amazing?  Doctors may not like it, but our pocketbooks will certainly wear a happy face!