The Baby Boomer virus

The following information popped into my cyber mailbox in 2005.  My BFF Josie and I know this virus too well...

I thought you would want to know about this e-mail virus. Even the most advanced programs from Norton or McAfee cannot take care of this one.  It appears to affect those who were born prior to 1965.

Symptoms:

1. Causes you to send the same e-mail twice.   Done that!

2. Causes you to send a blank e-mail!  That too!

3. Causes you to send e-mail to the wrong person.  Yep!

4. Causes you to send it back to the person who sent it to you.  Who me?

5. Causes you to forget to attach the attachment.  Well, darn!

6. Causes you to hit "SEND" before you've finished.  Oh no -- not again!

7. Causes you to hit "DELETE" instead of "SEND."  And I just hate that!

8. Causes you to hit "SEND" when you should "DELETE."  Oh No!

IT IS CALLED THE "C-NILE VIRUS."

Mackay's Moral

A good friend of mine forwarded this thought-provoking article written by a nationally syndicated columnist.  Thanks, Mary!

When getting a paycheck means taking a pay cut
By Harvey Mackay

It's a great opportunity, maybe even your dream job. All the stars are lining up -- the company you've admired, top-notch staff, terrific benefits, ideal location. You've aced the interview, and you know you'd be a perfect fit. What more could you ask for?

Maybe that's the wrong question. Maybe you should be asking, what less would you be willing to take?

A 2009 CNN Money report says, "With more than three job seekers for every opening, more workers are having to take significant pay cuts to find employment."

Current employment figures are not much brighter. Experts predict we will not see job numbers improve to pre-recession levels for at least five years. And even though unemployment benefits have been extended, they are no match for a rewarding, fulfilling job. That's a message I hear repeatedly as I release the paperback edition of my book, Use Your Head To Get Your Foot in the Door: Job Search Secrets No One Else Will Tell You.

Many are out of work through no fault of their own and can't afford to wait for the dream job to open. Others discover the jobs they had weren't right for them -- too much responsibility, too many hours, burnout or philosophical differences. Whatever the reason, plenty of qualified people who are looking for jobs have real challenges convincing interviewers that they can work for less and be content.

Shrinking company budgets force managers to get maximum bang for the buck while finding ways to maintain or grow business. Hiring decisions have greater impact when fewer employees must carry the load. A bad hire can be disastrous.

Try to explain to a hiring manager that you are interested in taking a job that includes a pay cut, and a number of questions pop up. Were you overpaid at your last job? Will you jump ship the minute a more lucrative opportunity is presented? Will you be able to survive on a smaller salary? If you are such a bargain, why hasn't someone else hired you already? Are you willing to work harder for less money? Do you have some ulterior motive?

Hiring managers look for competent people who are confident in their abilities. Your biggest selling point, surprisingly, isn't your price tag.

You have demonstrated that you are flexible, willing to take on a new challenge, bring great experience with you and can't wait to get started. You are prepared to work as hard as you can to advance the company's goals. The interviewer is starting to wonder why any company would have let you slip away.

The biggest mistake you can make at that point is to show any bitterness about your situation. Instead, seize the day by radiating your most positive face. Your last company's loss will be your next employer's gain!

As an astute person, you know that salary negotiations come much later, after you have convinced the interviewer that you are the best candidate for the position. Be honest when you are asked why you are willing to work for less.

"I know that the market can't support my previous salary, so I have committed to downsizing my lifestyle. I decided having a vacation home was becoming more work than pleasure."

One cautionary note: Don't apologize for showing interest in a lower-paying job. Your worth can't be measured only in dollars.

A pay cut may mean a better job, or the path to one. Keep your options open! When you are less focused on money than on opportunity, you may be pleasantly surprised at how profitable that opportunity can be.

Mackay's Moral: The difference between survive and thrive is keeping your options alive.

Top Tunes for the Baby Boomers

This amusing piece was forwarded by Josie (my BFF).  Thank you, sistah!

Some of the artists of the 60's are revising their hits with new lyrics to accommodate aging baby boomers who can remember doing the "Limbo” as if it were yesterday.

They include:
Bobby  Darin ---
Splish, Splash, I Was Havin' A Flash

Herman's  Hermits ---
Mrs.  Brown, You've Got a Lovely Walker

Ringo Starr  ---
I Get By With A Little Help From Depends

The Bee Gees ---
How  Can You Mend A Broken Hip?

Roberta  Flack ---
The  First Time Ever I Forgot Your Face

Johnny  Nash ---
I  Can't See Clearly Now.

Paul  Simon ---
Fifty  Ways To Lose Your Liver

The  Commodores ---
Once,  Twice, Three Times To The Bathroom

Procol  Harem---
A  Whiter Shade Of Hair

 

Leo Sayer  ---

 You Make Me  Feel Like Napping

The  Temptations --- 

Papa's Got  A Kidney Stone

Abba ---
Denture Queen 
"You  haven't seen my teeth have you Wilma?  

Tony Orlando  ---
Knock  3 Times On The Ceiling If You Hear Me Fall

Helen Reddy  ---
I Am  Woman, Hear Me Snore

Leslie  Gore---
It's  My Procedure, and I'll  Cry If I Want To 

And  Last but NOT least...

Willie  Nelson ---
On the Commode Again

In case you didn’t notice it the first time around - Depends now has a new motto!

A lesson in Spanish

I have stored quite a lot of forwarded e-mails, many funny, some informative.  It has never ceased to amaze me how people out there can think of creative ways to brighten our cyber mailboxes.  May you enjoy this one!

A Spanish teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine.

“House” for instance, is feminine: “la casa.”
“Pencil,” however, is masculine: “el lapiz.”

A student asked, “What gender is 'computer’?”

Instead of giving the answer, the teacher split the class into two groups, male and female, and asked them to decide for themselves whether “computer” should be a masculine or a feminine noun. Each group was asked to give four reasons for its recommendation.

The men's group decided that “computer” should definitely be of the feminine gender (“la computadora”), because:

1 No one but their creator understands their internal logic;

2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else;

3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval; and

4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself sending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

(THIS GETS BETTER!)

The women's group, however, concluded that computers should be masculine (“el computador”), because:

1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on;

2. They have a lot of data but still can't think for themselves;

3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem; and

4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.

The women won.

Send this to all the smart women you know...and all the men who have a sense of humor.

Red bats for prosperity

Not many people like bats nor would anyone I know ever consider making those creatures a household pet.  As weird as it sounds, bats are symbols of serious money in feng shui.

According to the most popular feng shui author Lillian Too, “Although often associated with witches in the West, bats - especially red bats - have signified abundance n prosperity, happiness and longevity to the Chinese for many years. Bats are usually painted cinnabar red, the color for joy, and expected in fives to represent the five blessings from heaven; wealth, health, longevity, love of virtue and a natural death.”

Long before I learned about and started practicing feng shui, I had red bat symbols gracing my walls.  At that time I wasn’t aware that those were the feng shui-blessed bats that should be displayed in the home to attract good fortune.  Call me intuitive because I seem to have the knack for buying wall decors that carried auspicious significance!  Hallelujah!

After being taught the significance of red bats, I went shopping for bat decor a few years ago and found a metal bell designed with five bats encircling a prosperity symbol.  At that time I didn't realize that such a design was very auspicious in wish-fulfilling desires. Looking back, I feel confident that a mystical force drove me to find it because the item was in a most un-feng shui section of the store:  the gardening shop.

According to http://chinesehoroscop-e.com/astrology/feng-shui-bats.php:

Chinese admiration for bats began thousands of years before Christ. Sometimes people view the Oriental world as an interplay between active and passive forces (male and female). Bats were thought to embody the male principle while the flowers and fruits are the female. These creatures (were) also often displayed with the peach, a popular female fertility symbol. The peaches, being one of man’s favorite fruits were first cultivated in China about 5,000 years ago. Before that, these fruits relied on bats for dispersal of their seeds.

In the Manchu period, bats were very popular and used everywhere. They were painted onto vases and walls, worn on the robes of the emperors and carved into furniture and thrones.

Bats of a thousand years old were found in caverns of the hills in China which is silverish in color and are fed on stalactites.  They attained very old age and that is believed by ancient scholars because bats lived deep in caves and also because “they swallowed their breath”. While the longevity of bat remains unsolved, researchers have confirmed that these animals far outlive other mammals of similar size. And because of this, bats have become a symbol of longevity.

In feng shui applications, bat is used as a wealth cure and considered a symbol of wealth because the word bat “fook” has the same pronounciation as “prosperity” in Chinese. Bat also came to represent longevity and happiness, so it is an auspicious symbol in Chinese culture.

Groups of five bats is said to be more powerful formula for abundance and fulfilment of dreams. Five bats have long been used by Chinese artists to represent the five blessings: prosperity, long life, love of virtue, health and a trangquil, natural death. These bats are often bright red and encircle a stylized caligraph known as the symbol of prosperity. This popular bat motif can often be found embroidered on expensive clothing, this to imply that a person’s prosperity had resulted from virtuous lifestyle.

The bat is also sometimes depicted biting a golden coin and this plaque is enhanced by a mystic knot and red tassel. It is hung normally in the front portion of your house or at the maindoor or any chi entry points in order to invite wealth, health, good fortune and natural death at a ripe age. A pair of bats brings double happiness.

The bats can be hung in the West or Northwest to activate the element of metal for a happy family and mentor luck to gain support from helpful and important people. You can also place them in your living room, library, reading room, bedroom, kitchen, dining and business premise. Hang them on the outside of your door and window to ward off disease.

After enjoying the blessings of displaying red bats in the home, I developed a brand new respect for these creatures.  Bats don't scare me anymore.  In fact, red bats are regarded with much fondness and will be in my home to stay. 

credit:  http://www.fengshuimall.com/



Retirement blues

The other day I overheard a funny exchange between the bus driver and one of the female passengers.  The driver was sharing the news that he recently purchased an 8’ x 12’ greenhouse when the lady asked him:  “If you don’t mind my asking, how old are you?” 

The driver replied: “I’m 73.”

The lady said:  “My… you don’t look your age!”

Driver:  “That’s because I’m still working.”

The driver’s remark gave me a mental giggle.  Come to think of it, at that age people should be sitting in their rocking chairs, taking it easy and pondering on how life had been nice to them.  But the hard reality is, due to today’s economic battles, people are working over and beyond their age retirement expectancy.

One woman I work with is very positive that she’ll be in the workforce forever.  I advised her not to think that way because it might become her reality.  However, she said that there was no choice because if she opts to collect her government pension at the designated age, she can’t really expect to receive money that would comfortably support her.

I know a couple who have been retired for quite a while now.  Thirty years ago, they migrated to America from another country.  When they retired from their long years of employment, they decided to sell their house and possessions, pack up and return to their homeland where their U.S. pension checks can multiply and allow them to live like millionaires.  They are among the blessed citizens of America who can have the option to spend their retirement dollars in a country where the currency exchange rate would give them a life of prosperity.  If you are among the lucky ones with this kind of possibility in your retirement future, count your blessing!

Until a few years ago, I haven’t really thought about retiring and collecting Social Security.  Recently, however, I can’t help but consider this subject with some serious thought.  I have more than paid my dues in the corporate jungle and enjoying the fruits of hard work while I still can doesn’t seem like a very bad idea.  My BFF Josie is planning to retire in a couple of years and possibly work part-time.  I wish I could say the same, but I have to continue working until my mortgage payments become a thing of the past.  This is a time when I wish that I opted for leasing versus buying a home.  Because the home values depreciated significantly in recent years, many homes have become liabilities rather than assets.  My worst fear is dying with the home mortgage still unsettled.  Like most people, I’d like to leave something of value behind.

I’m sure that many senior citizens who find themselves trapped in their financial hole aren’t happy working the grind until they drop.  But it’s not a choice that they can really control unless their portfolios can take care of them.  Unfortunately, the tough economy dictates their prolonged employment so that they can cope with their personal financial challenges.

On this unpleasant note. I wish everyone well and hope that a gentler, kinder economy will not be far behind.

Did you know that...

Drinking two glasses of Gatorade can relieve headache pain almost immediately without the unpleasant side effects caused by traditional "pain relievers."

Colgate toothpaste makes an excellent salve for burns.

Before you head to the drugstore for a high-priced inhaler filled with mysterious chemicals, try chewing on a couple if curiously strong Altoids peppermints will clear up stuffed nose.  They'll clear up your stuffed nose.

Achy muscles from a bout of flu?  Mix 1 tablespoon of horseradish in 1 cup of olive oil.  Let the mixture sit for 30 minutes, then apply it as a massage oil, for instany relief for aching muscles.

Sore throat?  Just mix 1/4 cup of vinegar with 1/4 cup honey and take 1 tablespoon six times a day.  The vinegar kills the bacteria.

Cure urinary tract infections with Alka-Seltzer.  Just dissolve two tablets with in a glass of water and drink it at the onset of the symptoms.  Alka-Seltzer begins eliminating urinary tract infections almost instantly -- even though the product was never advertised for this.  (Note:  Alka-Seltzer Plus Cold Medicine is not the same and contains aspirin, which can cause stomach bleeding if you have ulcers.)

Honey remedy for skin blemishes... Cover the blemish with a dab of honey and place a Band-Aid over it.  Honey kills the bacteria, keeps the skin sterile, and speeds healing.  Works overnight.

Listerine therapy for toenail fungus... Get rid of unsightly toenail fungus by soaking your toes in Listerine mouthwash.  The powerful antiseptic leaves your toenails looking healthy again.

Easy eyeglass protection... To prevent the screws in eyeglasses from loosening, apply a small drop of Maybelline Crystal Clear nail polish to the threads of the screws before tightening them.

Coca Cola cure for rust... Forget those expensive rust removers.  Just saturate an abrasive sponge with Coca Cola and scrub the rust stain.  The phosphoric acid in the coke is what gets the job done.

Cleaning liquid that doubles as bug killer... If menacing bees, wasps, hornets, or yellow jackets get in your home and you can't find the insecticide, try a spray of Formula 409.  Insects drop to the ground instantly.

Smart splinter remover... Just pour a drop of Elmer's Glue-All over the splinter, let dry, peel the dried glue off the skin.  The splinter sticks to the dried glue.

Hunt's tomato paste boil cure...  Cover the boil with Hunt's tomato paste as a compress.  The acids from the tomatoes soothe the pain and bring the boil to a head.

Balm for broken blisters... To disinfect a broken blister, dab on a few drops of Listerine... a powerful antiseptic.

Heinz vinegar to heal bruises... Soak a cotton ball in white vinegar and apply it to the bruise for one hour.  The vinegar reduces the blueness and speeds up the healing process.

Kill fleas instantly.  Dawn dishwashing liquid does the trick.  Add a few drops to your dog's bath and shampoo the animal thoroughly.  Rinse well to avoid skin irritations.  Goodbye fleas.

Rainy day cure for dog odor... Next time your dog comes in from the rain, simply wipe down the animal with Bounce or any dryer sheet, instantly making your dog smell springtime fresh.

Eliminate ear mites....  All it takes is a few drops of Wesson corn oil in your cat's ear.  Massage it in, then clean with a cotton ball.  Repeat daily for three days.  The oil soothes the cat'sskin, smothers the mites, and accelerates healing.

Quaker Oats for fast pain relief... It's not for breakfast anymore!  Mix 2 cups of Quaker Oats and 1 cup of water in a bowl and warm in the microwave for 1 minute, cool slightly, and apply the mixture to your hands for soothing relief from arthritis pain.

The above tips came to me hundreds of e-mails ago.  May you find one, or all, useful in your life!

The pavement's Picasso

credit:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Julian_Beever

If you’re among the lucky ones, you might have been the recipient of the 3D chalk drawings below that have been making the rounds of the e-mail universe.  When I received these photos, no information was included concerning the brains behind these magnificent works of art.

Soooo… what’s the curious to do?  I Googled and found the vital statistics so that a face could be attached to these incredible pieces.  Below is what I gathered about the very talented chalk artist from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Julian_Beever:

Julian Beever is an English chalk artist^[1] who has been creating trompe-l'œil chalk drawings on pavement surfaces since the mid-1990s. He uses a projection technique called anamorphosis to create the illusion of three dimensions when viewed from the correct angle. It is often possible to position a person within the image as if they were interacting with the scene.

Beever first designs his work on paper. Once finalised, a camera is placed at a distance from the art on the pavement which he returns to in order to observe the image through the lens a number of times, as the camera's wide angled lens can create an optical illusion which distorts the actual size of objects, which aids in maintaining perspective.

Beever works internationally as a freelance artist and creates murals for companies.

Besides this pavement art, Beever also paints murals with acrylic paints and replicas of the works of masters and oil paintings, and creates collages. Among his other work are drawings, usually themed around music.

I’ve seen how  this “Pavement Picasso” wave his magic on YouTube and it was thoroughly amazing!  What can I say….When the Good Lord distributed creative juices to humanity, Mr. Beever obviously grabbed more than a bucketful! 

Julian Beever, your interesting and unique pavement accomplishments have inspired joy and awe and the world thanks you!

 

Reaping the harvest

One cyber blessing I frequently enjoy is receiving lovely stories via e-mail.  Below is an example…

A BEAUTIFUL STORY

             

An unemployed graduate woke up one morning and checked his pocket. All he had left was $100. He decided to use it to buy food and then wait for death as he was too proud to go begging. He was frustrated as he could find no job, nobody was ready to help him.

He bought food and as he sat down to eat, an old man and two little children came along and asked him to help them with food as they had not eaten for almost a week. He looked at them. They were so lean that he could see their bones coming out.

Their eyes had gone into the socket. With the last bit of compassion he had, he gave them the food. The old man and children prayed for him that will bless and prosper him and then gave him a very old coin. The young graduate said to them "you need the prayer more than I do".

With no money, no job, no food, the young graduate went under the bridge to rest and wait for death. As he was about to sleep, he saw an old newspaper on the floor. He picked it up, and suddenly he saw an advertisement for people with old coins to come to a certain address.  He decided to go there with the old coin the old man gave him.

On getting to the place, he gave the proprietor the coin. Alas, the proprietor screamed, brought out a big book and showed the young graduate a photograph. This same old coin was worth $3M.

The young graduate was overjoyed as the proprietor gave him a bank draft for $3M within an hour. He collected the bank draft, went in search of the old man and little children. By the time he got to where he left them eating, they had gone. He inquired from the owner of the canteen who told him that they even left a note for him.

He quickly opened the note thinking it would lead him to find them. But alas, the words in the note reads thus:  "You gave us your all and we have rewarded you back with the coin."  Signed God the Father, The Son and The Holy Ghost. 1 Kings 17:10-16;Matthew 11:28-30 

Have you given your all to Jesus Christ?

If you haven't, do so today and He will surprise you.

PRAYER:

Here is your financial blessing! It's a simple prayer, you got 30 seconds?

If you need a financial blessing, continue reading this email.

Heavenly Father, most Gracious and Loving God, I pray to You that You abundantly bless my family and me. I know that You recognize, that a family is more than just a mother, father, sister, brother, husband and wife, but all who believe and trust in You.  Father, I send up a prayer request for financial blessing for not only the person who sent this to me, but for me and all whom I have forwarded this message on to.  And that the power of joined prayer by those who believe and trust in You is more powerful than anything.  I thank You in advance for Your blessings.  Father God, deliver the person reading this right now and those who will read it in the near future from debt and debt burdens.  Release your Godly wisdom that I may be a good steward over all that You have given me Father, for I know how wonderful and mighty you are and how if we just obey You and walk in Your word and have the faith of a Mustard seed that You will pour out blessings.

I thank You now Lord for the recent blessings I have received and for the blessings yet to come because I know You are not done with me yet.  In Jesus Name, I pray, Amen.

The best policy

photo credit:  The Daily Herald, Joe Lewnard / AP

Yesterday a delightfully heartwarming news was all over the Internet.  A 54-year old man in the Chicago, IL area returned a bag containing $17,021 cash.  He could have taken the bag home and spent the money like it were his (finders, keepers... remember?).  But because his deceased parents raised him not to spend someone else’s hard-earned money, he did the right and honorable thing.

Wow.  This kind of positive "chicken soup for the soul" news never fails to get everyone excited!  Amidst so much terrorism and catastrophic events in our world, something comes along that brings a happy song to the heart.

The man, Robert Adams was craving for a large horchata (a refreshing rice or coconut milk drink).  He wanted a chorizo burrito to go with the drink, but he didn’t have the money.  He went to a Chase ATM and found a clear plastic bag sitting nearby.  It obviously contained checks, receipts and cash.  Because it was a clear plastic bag, Adams could clearly see the $20 and $100 bills inside.  That could have paid for more than a year’s worth of chorizo burritos and horchata!  The thought that it might have been a set-up did cross his mind because it seemed just too good to be true.

In the end, his parents’ upbringing about honesty ruled over his action.  Since “Chase” was printed on the plastic bag, Adams assumed that’s the bank it belonged to so he took the bag to the nearest Chase branch.  The teller informed him that the bag didn’t belong there as the ATM was replenished from inside so there wasn’t any reason why a bag would be left outside.

When the police was notified, it was discovered that the bag was left behind by a Loomis courier that was supposed to have taken the bag to another ATM location.

The news didn’t indicate whether or not Adams could expect a reward for his honesty.

The comments posted on the Internet following the article were hilarious, to quote:

“Elect this man to Congress.  At least we would have one honest man there.”

“Honest guy! Esp. in this economy!”

“What an honest man; people like him are hard to find.”

“They definitely should do something for the guy – even though we all know there are a few cameras in and around that cash machine, he might have been able to walk away with it – hook him up with his favorite burrito stand.”

“Hats off to you, Robert Adams.  Yo have proven that honesty is the best policy.  You are a good man and I hope that you are justly rewarded for your actions.”

“Honesty pays in the end and is its own reward, but dang, they could have at least bought this man’s burrito and cold drink.”

Yes, I agree with all the comments.  Such honest behavior should be rewarded.  It takes a great deal of integrity to do what this man had done.  Even if he doesn’t get compensated, I’m sure that the good feeling he felt doing what he thought was right was rewarding enough.  But, seriously, I wish that Loomis would give this man at least a year’s worth of his favorite burrito.

Whether or not Adams gets rewarded, I'm sure that his parents are now smiling from ear to ear.