Have you ever found yourself in a quiet moment and didn’t exactly know how to spend the time? Too quiet that the silence was almost deafening? And therefore uncomfortable?
For some people, such a moment would be an occasion to conveniently lay down and grab some zzz’s. Perhaps others would grab a book or newspaper… listen to music… watch television… pick up their cell phone to chit-chat with someone… or simply do nothing. What about you?
Unfortunately, for a lot of folks doing nothing is not their comfort zone. For me, doing nothing is letting go of any worries and allowing myself to enjoy the uninterrupted peace I find myself in. No need to do anything at all! That place I call Mind Alone is a godsend and, of course, I’ll go there anytime!
Don’t you think that much of the world’s stress today is the result of people rarely giving themselves permission to do absolutely nothing? A mental vacation, if you will. I have witnessed bored people in very annoying motions, like making twirling noises with their pen, pounding the nearest wall, stumping their feet… carrying on petty conversations on their cell phones… doing something (anything!) that can drive the next person crazy. Based on these observations, I have to say that many people might be simply afraid of alone time or you could call it, time-out from the world. They might be suffering from a fear of being left with themselves. May I call it selfaphobia?
Why do you think people are scared to be left alone in their own company?
I think that comfortably surrendering to the moment’s solitude is a sign of maturity. It can also be the world’s best excuse for doing nothing during times when we don’t really know what to do. If we can all learn to just pause and smell the coffee, while our planet continues to spin as usual, life will most likely be more enchanting.
If you ask me, I enjoy working on a crossword puzzle during a bus or train commute rather than just sit, look at people and possibly get annoyed at a fellow passenger calling attention to himself. Becoming irked at a stranger can be emotionally draining. Doing the crosswords will keep my mind occupied from petty distractions during the ride and potentially sharpen my brain to overcome the onset of the forgetfulness of ageing.
These days rare are the folks we know whom we can sit in a corner and they’ll manage to find something to amuse themselves with. Take away the books or reading materials, the TV set, the telephone, laptop or any electronic gadget, even the company of others... and they’ll still be fine. And perfectly happy. Those people will do well in any setting because they aren’t dependent on others or material stuff for their personal joy and comfort.
I would certainly like to be a member of such a rare breed. How about you? Not dependent on anyone or anything for our bliss makes us strongly self-sufficient and more able to cope with life’s many disappointments. I guess that makes us better human beings too.
Meditation is a good practice. I recommend it for tuning out the noises in our minds. A long time ago, my childhood friend Daffodil and I attended weekend Raja Yoga sessions in Manila. We would go into a quiet room and sit lotus-style on the floor and listen to exotic and soothing Indian music. Our trainer (the teacher who meditated with us) instructed to keep our eyes open, resting them on a comfortable spot in the room and we had to mentally leave the sights and sounds around us. The resulting calm was like an out-of-body experience! That went on for 15 minutes and when the session was over, I always felt the most relaxed I’d ever been. It was akin to waking up fully rested from a deep slumber.
Now instead of Raja Yoga exercise, I simply mentally run away from the pressures of workaday living whenever there’s a chance. It’s easy for me to do this now that I’ve given up driving. I honestly recommend not driving if you can. When you let someone else drive you to places (like the bus or train operator unless you have your own limo driver), you can be still and relaxed until it’s time to get up and go to your destination. We absolutely need all the mental naps we can get!
If we all learn and appreciate the power of (mental and physical) solitude, I bet you that we’ll be living in a more wonderful, stress-free world! The ultimate reward is feeling the constant joy that makes life worth living.
